Thursday, September 02, 2004

Just a regular boring post

I just thought I'd write for a minute before heading to bed. I suppose I should be listening to the president's speech, but I just am growing weary of everything. Sigh. This election looks like it's going to be one of the most divisive ones in my memory. So many people I know can't decide who to vote for, OR, they are upset and defensive about who they are or are not voting for. Frankly I can't figure it out and go back and forth. I think I finally made a decision because I really respect McCain.

Anyway... my purpose here is not to be political.

NCU is going full blast now. So much is happening it's hard to stay on top of it all. I am working as hard as I ever have in my life and still I can't get everything done that needs to be done. I've finally found a place to live where I just don't feel guilty about not being able to do everything. In the past I gave up sleep, now I can't, my health demands that I get my sleep, so if everything doesn't get done, well, it just doesn't get done. It's not for lack of trying on my part. But a person can only do so much in a day. We run to ragged as it is. :)

It was interesting today in Chapel the speaker talked about Divine Appointments. The kind that God just brings together to do the miraculous in someone's life. He spoke to the faculty last week with a similar challenge. It really, truly, struck me powerfully. I already valued that, but have let the busyness of life take over. Especially where I work - there is so much to do and never enough time. Today I had to choose between a student and a department thing I had planned. A student came to me and asked if she could talk with me after class and I immediately knew what it was about. Nothing was said, but I just knew it. And at the same time thought I could be wrong, but nevertheless love this student very much and invited her up to my office. We sat down to talk and sure enough it was what I thought. I spent time ministering, praying, reading the Bible, encouraging... etc. It was truly a time for God. I was glad I chose the PERSON over the program thing.

Of course, that was what Chapel was about too. And I prayed with students after chapel. But I kept feeling this pressure that I had to hurry up because time was very limited and even though lunch is next (technically) I had only 45 minutes to run and get food (can't miss a meal while still nursing or I get really dizzy) make it to a class I needed to visit in on during lunch, get to my office to pump for a while, and get ready for my next class! Whew! Lack of oxygen just thinking about it!

How ironic! To hear a message about waiting on God and not being so scheduled that you can't make time for a "divine appointment" but feeling so pressured to get so much done! How to reconcile all that? It will take God's help, that's for sure.

I am going to go to bed! Whew! Tired.

Don't worry, more pics coming soon. Sorry it's taking me so long.


Kristy said...

Every time I read a post I pray for you.......I send my arms across the miles and hold onto you and Michael and Mazen....knowing that my life would be incredibly different without you in it. God's divine appointment for us to meet.....has changed my life. I know you work so hard and I only wish I could have stayed in Minn even if it was just to be two more hands and an extra brain. I wish I could part with half myself to send to you via FedEx, but apparently I need all of me just survive one step at time out here....and that's just waiting. I wonder how I can feel so awfully exauhsted and frustrated after barely a week of waiting. Wow...waiting on God has taken on a completely differment meaning to me.
I love you three oh so very much .. it's hard to say in words.

Barbara said...

Thanks for your sweet words and encouragement. I am so excited for what you are doing and what God is doing in your life. You are going to go FAR in ministry and with Him. NEVER give up. You are a bright light and have one of the greatest laughs of all time!

Jenni said...

Wow, I think JoAnn made a good decision in asking you to come to North Central and be in this position. Then you made a good one in taking her up on it! ;) I agree with Kristy, you have done much good here in Mpls, and I probably don't even know the half of it.

Is it okay if I come over this evening to get a picture of you guys and Mazen so I can show Emily your cool haircut and how much Mazen has grown?

Love you!

Barbara said...

Oops, I didn't see this in time. I didn't know you wanted to take a pic and I think Mazen was already asleep. I'll look for a recent pic of Mazen and me with haircut to show Emily. :) You are sweet, Jenni.